Les Touchers

You know when you sit down in a bus, plane or on a train and as soon as you find some comfortable position, you get a very relaxed neighbor. He is very relaxed about your personal space and leans his leg or a shoulder (or both) onto you so you are permanently physically touched by him. He is the toucher, the kind we all know.

You give way a bit to ‘untouch’, to re-create your already deprived personal space but he immediately claims that little space you have created while making a pleasant vocal approval how comfortable he is. You then have two options – give way a bit more or start fighting back. Eventually, you’ll resolve to the latter option because every inch you’ve given away was taken again and again.

At this point, you are gently pressing back, hoping that he would notice. You might even get a bit envious how relaxed this dude is because he doesn’t seem to be noticing your fightback. In your head you think that he doesn’t need a personal space. For now you want to be like him.

The previously beautiful views from the panoramic window are not as beautiful as before. You start skipping tracks in your playlist because the music doesn’t sound as good as before. You hope for a miracle that someone will get off soon and there will be a free space.

But none of that happens. You even drop a pen on the floor near to him, hoping that he will pick it up and pass it to you, which world be your moment to get YOUR SPACE BACK, but at this point, he’s already semi asleep. Your only hope is that he will need to go to the toilet or reach his bag.

Then his phone rings and as he’s reaching for his phone – you go for that space, ready for his next impact which comes straight after the phone call. He’s back to be a full time toucher again. But you are feeling sharp, resolute and uncompromising.

Until it gets so unpleasant that you’ll give way again…


If you are in the middle chair or by the isle, it’s your human right to get the armrest as the window person has the window. Unfortunately, there are multiple situations, when some people ignore the human rights on a hugely different scales, which could be easily observed any time you randomly switch the TV news on.

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